This morning as I sit here with my coffee, my mind is blown away by this gift I’ve been given. Tears stream down my face as I marvel at the way God has orchestrated his plan and allowed for me to be blessed by His immense love and the love of another human being.
This gift of a kidney, prayed for, anticipated, hoped for, cried for has been given selflessly, creating new bonds of love and friendship and has strengthened my faith in ways I couldn’t have even anticipated.
A complete stranger, willing to sacrifice a kidney so that I can live a full life. Out of all the millions of people, God had Kristina picked out those 2.5 years ago when we stepped out in faith and had my kidney removed. We didn’t know how He’d provide or when He’d provide, but knew deep in our souls He would provide. This still blows my mind.
The living life trusting and resting in the provisions of God is not easy. Our humanness gets in the way. We have plans, ideas, things we’d like to accomplish-the world our oyster, so we think. But to learn to live a life based on the promises of God, on faith in His provision and protection for our lives is a whole other matter. Sometimes nothing makes sense, we can’t wrap our mind around our circumstances, the direction our lives might be going and we wonder, why things happen or where things are going. What is the trajectory ahead?
I’ve had to learn to live more in the moment, to not plan too far in advance, and to take each day as it came because I didn’t know how I’d feel each day. But, in learning to live in the moment, I saw God at work almost every day. In the sunrise, in the quiet moments in His Word, in the fun moments with friends with laughter and joy, the immense joy of sharing time with grandchildren, in watching my children become parents. And in the moments of quiet, there were days when I could feel the presence of God surround me, His love filling my should and this overwhelming sense of peace that He’s got me in the palm of His hand. This is the way I want to continue to live as I move forward in this new normal.
I have learned to stop being so reliant on me, to lean into others and to lean into God. Life is precious and life is about people. Relationships matter. Though I have pulled back from many activities because of how tired I’d been, I haven’t had the energy to engage, I miss relationships. I miss my people. God intends for us to gather together, to do life together. Even in a pandemic, life is to be shared, just shared differently.
How do we live life more in the moment? That’s a good question. It takes a certain mindset to put “plans” down for people. Yes, there are things in our lives that need to be taken care of, but it is learning to listen to God and what His plan is for you. Is it really necessary to clean the house this moment, or is there a friend God is prompting you to reach out to. You need to grocery shop, is there someone who needs groceries you could pick up for them as well. Could you lighten the load of a young mother needing a break from her kids. How about a note to let someone know you are thinking of them. So many opportunities to bless others with your presence and to show the love of Christ through relationship.
The numerous texts I’ve received have bolstered me in so many ways over the days, those little nuggets of love have made a difference in my life. I can only hope I will be as available as others have been for me during this time.
My people, my tribe so to speak, my sisters in life, have loved me through it all. And when I returned home from the hospital I was blessed my the funniest of funny signs all over my home. These friends have been there forever and without them, life would be dull. God has specifically placed them in my life over time and I am so grateful for each and every one of them. They are a blessing to me. I love them dearly and they mean the world to me. I hope you enjoy the humor they gave me when I returned home from the hospital and let me tell you-laughing after a kidney transplant-no fun feat, it hurts, but it was worth it!!
May you be blessed by the Lord with a richness of love today and may you take the time to reach out to a friend in love.