Time and rest. It does wonders for healing, improves our energy, can lift our spirits. It takes time to heal, be renewed, and restored to full strength and in that time we have a great opportunity to see God at work.
To see Him at work in times of healing and rest, we need to look past our circumstances and lift our eyes to the one who can fill us with patience as He works within our hearts and bodies.
As I type those words, I am discovering that this is not always so easy. Particularly the patience to allow Him to work. In today’s society we want quick fixes, but a quick fix will not change our hearts. I always thought I was a patient person, but God has shown me that it is His timing in my physical healing that is important, not some unattainable “date” on the calendar for life to return to normal. I think I have been fighting against God over the last few days and trying everything in my power to change the set backs we’ve experienced.
Praises to the King, my surgery was a success, the cancer removed with no sign of spread. I am so grateful God lead us in the direction to remove my kidney. The pathology showed multiple tumors and no cancer in my lymph nodes. God is good!
Yet even in the good news, I have allowed my eyes to fix not upon God’s abundant blessing, but on the challenges I am facing right now. I am experiencing swelling in my left foot(unknown cause, not a blood clot, praise God), high blood pressure that won’t budge(now trying medication), and recurring headaches( I’ve never had headaches before). Over the last few days, for whatever reason, this is where I chose to fix my thoughts instead of fixing them on the One who can heal in time. And all it got me was endless frustration and anger at the lack of progress, and probably has been causing the headaches.
Now don’t get me wrong, God is good even in these challenges, there is medication to help with the blood pressure and in time it will moderate, there are doctors to see for the swelling and the headaches, well I that’s what happens when my eyes drift from the One who is in charge, instead of praying, I chose to continually worry.
So I must admit, my lack of surrender has filled me with anxiety. But God, so patient and gracious, reminded me this week of Joseph. Joseph endured much, yet stayed strong and faithful even in the darkest of hours. His brothers tossed him away like garbage in a pit and sold him into slavery, yet God was with him and helped him excel. Joseph was given power to run his masters household. Then Joseph was falsely accused of trying to sleep with his master’s wife and sent to jail, yet God was with him and helped him interpret dreams and Pharaoh put him in charge of the kingdom. This allowed for Jospeh to save his family during a time of famine in the land. Joseph chose to recognize and save even the brothers who sold him into slavery because he knew
“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” (Genesis 50:20)
In even the toughest of times, God is there, intending everything in every circumstance to accomplish His will for our lives. Knowing God is sovereign and His plans are perfect, I have responsibility every day for my response to my circumstances. I can chose to wallow or I can chose to see the face of God each day. So going forward, I chose a new outlook on my circumstances. I will not be weighed down by what appears to me to be a slow recovery, but see each day as an opportunity to do life with God and to be honest with the frustrations I experience. Truly one day at a time, for each day has enough problems of its own. (Matthew 6:34)
Out of the driest of grasses, even a flower can bloom because it is God who is in control each day. These 2 flowers served as a reminder today that God will bring new life into me and that I need not look for life to return to normal, but look for God to restore my life into something better than it was before. I pray and eagerly anticipate the newness He desires for me.
Are you caring a burden today that is filling you with anxiety? Offer up a prayer of surrender to the Lord and allow Him to fill you with the peace only He can provide.
“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. “ (Philippians 4:6-7)